Yet another flaw has been discovered in Diebold’s electronic voting machines. Company spokesman David Bear presents the watertight case for the defence:

“For there to be a problem here, you’re basically assuming a premise where you have some evil and nefarious election officials who would sneak in and introduce a piece of software,” he said. “I don’t believe these evil elections people exist.”

This guy should get some kind of prize. America is the country that gave us the word ratfucking, where party operatives jam the phone lines of their opponents on election day, and where people say they want to die in Chicago so they can remain politically active.